Firstly, apologies. I've been so busy with Big Brother and The X Factor that I haven't had time to update my blog. However, you've all been perusing and leaving comments - so cheers for that. It's nice to see.

 

So one night, there I was surfing (as you do), when I came across a surprising find: On The Buses, now on the Men & Motors channel. Imagine my shock when I found myself laughing. Cheap, vulgar and misogynistic  it may have been, with an over-reliance on saucy seaside postcard humour, but in these politically correct noughties days, it can boast making me laugh a couple of times. And that's no mean feat. Unlike the classic Steptoe And Son ("'Arrrrold!" "You dir....ty old man!"), it has dated horribly. It was aging even as it was broadcast during its original run from 1969-1973 - and yet, I found it all oddly endearing. Double decker buses! Glass milk bottles! Half pence coins! Smoking! 

 

Besides, how could anyone dislike bus driver Stan Butler (played by the 50ish Reg Varney)? Stan is characterised by his horniness: desperate for the mini-skirted, busty, nubile women working in the depot (who always fancy him), it's not unusual to find him clocking off and keeping the passengers waiting while he has a bit of 'ow's yer father' with the chosen wench. The series made Reg Varney an unlikely sex symbol - only in this country could a man like Reg become an object of desire. Makes yer proud to be British, doesn't it?

 

Stan's best mate is his conductor, a right jack-the-lad called Jack with a hugely infectious laugh who says "Cor blimey" more times than Jodie Marsh has been Tangoed (has anyone ever seen her natural skin colour?). Our horny bus driver lives with his bingo-obsessed mum who loves him to death. In the same house resides plain sister Olive and her layabout, sponging husband Ar'fur. One character who must be mentioned is long-suffering bus Inspector 'Blakey' Blake; Stan and Jack delighted in making his life a misery, prompting weekly lip-quivering exclamations of "I'll get you Butler!" and "I 'ate you, Butler!"

 

I think the very absurdity of On The Buses is what tickled me the most: two middle-aged skirt-chasers (one with teeth Austin Powers would envy). Poor Olive, frequently slated by bitter, lazy husband Ar'fur. Mum, who feeds her son more stodge than yer average foie gras farmer gets into a goose (she wants her son married, but thinks nobody's good enough for him). The female conquests - who are either blind, or newly-released from prison. And finally, Blakey. Poor Blakey. Was there ever a more pathetic authority figure? 

 

To put this daft programme into even starker perspective, it's as well to remember that it was around at the very same time as Monty Python's Flying Circus. And just a couple of years after the bus roared into the depot for the last time, John Cleese would go on to Fawlty Towers. But still, it got me chuckling which is more than I can say for the likes of 'Orrible, My Family, Dinner Ladies, Grown Ups, My Hero, Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps etc 

 

Today I am mostly lovin' - BBC Four for repeating Spike Lee's searing documentary When The Levees Broke. Quality, quality television.

 

Today I am mostly hatin' - Everybody Hates Chris. Not the show - but that bloody Footloose promo! Flippin' 'eck Tucker! Hasn't the Paramount Comedy Channel got any staff these days? Change the bloody promo! 

 

MSN Editor Coops

 

Our TV relationship with America may seem to be all one way traffic (their way), but good ol' Blighty has been known to provide fodder for the US Networks. Take the BBC's Till Death Us Do Part. Well, the Yanks certainly did. The 1960s/70s comedy classic featuring the iconic Alf Garnett was reworked in the US as All In The Family. Alf turned into Archie Bunker and Spinal Tap/When Harry Met Sally's Rob Reiner played the liberal son-in-law (played by Tony Blair's father-in-law Tony Booth in the British version). Very popular it was too.

 

Then there was Sanford and Son (a US 1970s version of our Steptoe and Son) starring comedy legend Redd Foxx, one of the men who inspired Richard Pryor. Two other acclaimed shows with American versions include Queer As Folk and The Office. Take a trip over the pond and you'll find the likes of: Celebrity Fit Club, Supernanny, What Not To Wear, Strictly Come Dancing (entitled Dancing With The Stars in the US), Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, Whose Line Is It Anyway?, Faking It and Wife Swap (Trading Spouses is the American version).

 

But it doesn't always work out. The US version of Cracker, starring the late character actor Robert Pastorelli, was less successful. That's what you get when you water down everything that makes Cracker so great in the first place. Also barely making an impact were the likes of Men Behaving Badly and The Ropers (based on George & Mildred). But doggone it, if our cousins aren't trying again. This time with a retooling of Life On Mars. Dublin-born, US-based actor Colm Meaney has been in final talks to star in the pilot episode. He'd take the role played by the brilliant Philip Glenister in the original BBC series. Irish actor Jason O'Mara has already signed up to take on the fantastic John Simm's character Sam Tyler, the modern-day detective who finds himself back in 1972.

 

I'd be very interested to watch the resulting US series and I really hope one of our channels picks it up. It is being produced by David E. Kelley, the man who gave us L.A. Law, Chicago Hope, Boston Legal and Ally McBeal, to name a few. The ABC network will screen it stateside, which doesn't bode well for the grittier elements so synonymous with Life On Mars. Will they allow 'good' characters to smoke? Will they screen the racial abuse of fellow police officers, in addition to that of criminals? Will there be misogyny? In other words, will they have the balls to do the show justice on Network TV? We'll see...I hope.

 

Got a comment or opinion? Leave one - I always answer back.

 

Today I am mostly lovin' - ITV4 for their reruns of The Professionals ("Cover me!"). Bodie and Doyle running around in their Capris, eyeing up the 'birds' and smashing the life out of their enemies. Why don't we make shows like this anymore?

 

Today I am mostly hatin' -  The X Factor's inclusion of contestants who are clearly a sandwich or two short of a picnic. Uncomfortable viewing; who's selecting these people?

 

I've just returned from the press launch for The X Factor. As is always the case with these things, the journalists were on time, the organisers weren't; it started later than originally stated. The venue was London's ritzy Mayfair Hotel where we were greeted by the lovely ladies at talkbackThames, one of the companies behind the show. Champagne, Bucks Fizz and various soft drinks kept us happy while we waited. Everyone was making quick surreptitious looks around the room to see if they recognised anybody and sure enough old faves like Boyd Hilton from Heat and Jacqui Stephen from everywhere (or so it seems) were in da house.

 

We were there to grill the judges but more importantly, we got a sneak press screening peek at the first X Factor show going out this Saturday at 7.40pm. As has been widely publicised, this year Simon Cowell and Sharon Osbourne are joined by Kylie's little (and less successful) sister Dannii Minogue and, returning to the series after his sacking and reinstatement, Louis Walsh. In the premier show, we also hear from an American geezer named Brian Friedman. He will put his experience as a dancer and choreographer to use styling the finalists' performances (he's worked with the likes of Britney and Mya). Dermot O'Leary takes over as The X Factor's new host, offering a shoulder for all those freaky rejects to cry on. And this change is definitely a welcome one as Kate Thornton got on my last nerve. This year, The X Factor's age limit drops to 14 so don't be too surprised if you see even more showbiz mums vicariously living out their dreams through their kids. Contestants will be split into Boys (14–24s), Girls (14–24s), 25 and Overs and Groups.

 

As soon as I downed my drink, I headed off to the screening room, eager to avoid the mad dash for seats. As expected, national press and magazines didn't have to worry about rushing their apparatifs as spaces were reserved for them. Us oiks (otherwise known as non-national press and magazines - and always web) were allocated the middle and back. The event was over-subscribed and the scramble to find seats delayed it all further. Eventually chairs were brought in from outside and we could begin.

 

Sharon Osbourne and Brian Friedman were absent, but the remaining show staples were introduced to us. First, the ubiquitous Fearne Cotton (the only TV show she's not presenting these days is the news) followed by the genial, bouncy Dermot O'Leary (does he have springs on his feet?). Dannii Minogue looked tanned and glam and provided a stark contrast to the pale, decidedly un-glamorous Louis Walsh (hugely cheered for some bizarre reason). Finally Simon Cowell, he of the square head, square hair and square chest, stepped into the room. He was followed a couple of seconds later by a massive, bald bodyguard who looked like an inflated, taller version of Dr Evil's Mini-Me. Simon Cowell was exactly as he is on all those talent shows he rakes in mega-dosh from. Unerringly so. I half expected him to turn to me and say something like, "Your mother doesn't love you if she's convinced you that you can sing."

 

And so to the show. An embargo prevents me from revealing too much. However, I can safely say that if you're an X Factor fan, you're in for a treat. Dermot O'Leary erases painful memories of Kate Thornton, but Brian Friedman is somewhat disadvantaged by the fact that nobody here knows him from Adam. Speaking personally, I do not have an Adam among my family, friends or acquaintances, but I still know my non-existant Adam better than The X Factor's Brian. The Louis and Simon double act feels as good as a comfortable old pair of slippers and Dannii Minogue isn't as bad as I thought she'd be (Shazzer is just Shazzer).

 

The audition stage has lost none of its compulsiveness - it's still the best part of The X Factor. London auditions were held at my beloved Arsenal's Emirates Stadium (ta very much for the funds Simon - we desperately need to reinforce our back line). Thousands of hopefuls squeezed into a tiny pocket of Islington; the only time I've seen more chavs in N7 is when we play Chelsea. There is still the familiar mixture of the sadly deluded, the crackpots, the tuneless, the sob stories, the auditionees who are clearly a sandwich or two short of a picnic, the 'what-the-hell-was-that?' freaks and the genuinely talented. Look out for a brother and sister act - hilarious! I can say no more than that. Two singers in particular stood out for the right reasons; one very young and one very unexpected. I definitely feel that the eventual winner may come from this first show - it was that strong an opener. The X Factor is sooooooo slickly produced and edited, you'll never have a better time having your emotions so shamelessly manipulated - laughter one minute, tears the next. In short, must-see television returns to Saturday night.

 

Looking forward to it? Dislike it intensely? Leave a comment here.

 

Today I am mostly lovin' - Virgin Media for buying some classic Brookside episodes and making them available on demand. "Our Damon", "Our Kid", shell-suits, "da bizzies", "da leccy", 'taches - ah, memories. 

 

Today I am mostly hatin' - The Morrisons adverts with Denise Van Outen. If I hear her going on about fresh bread one more time, I'll tell them where to stick it...

 

MSN Editor Coops

 

"Bootiful!" It was the first word Jamie Oliver enthused on his new Channel 4 show Jamie At Home and it made me sigh. It was the kind of sigh you emit in the supermarket queue when you've unloaded a week's worth of shopping only to find that the till assistant needs to ring the bell for her manager. Y'see Jamie's new culinary adventure is a laid-back show extolling the virtues of fresh fruits and vegetables and every 30-minute episode will be devoted to one specific food. Last night was tomatoes.

 

So far, so what?

 

Yeah it was all mouth-watering and delicious and I've never seen tomatoes look so appetising and Jamie was showing us his lovely jubbly bubbly persona, but this isn't the Jamie Oliver I want to see anymore. I loved him on The Naked Chef, despite the Mockney-ness which made me want to slap him. And then he annoyed the you-know-what out of me with those bloomin' Sainsbury's ads...until Jamie's Chef. Talk about reinvention. Jamie became a social entrepreneur, training unemployed kids at his restaurant Fifteen and making utterly compelling TV at the same time. There was Jamie, almost driven mad by what he'd taken on - and it made me root for him with the kind of fervour I usually reserve for my beloved Arsenal. I wanted him to win so much. And he did.

 

Just when I thought he couldn't rise any higher in my estimation, along came his TV crusade, Jamie's School Dinners. The result? Not only brilliant, educational TV (my nephew hasn't eaten a turkey twizzler or chicken nugget at school since), but also an extra £280million plus from the government to be spent on better school meals. The Knighthood is probably on ice...

 

So Jamie's going 'Home' and his heavily publicised return to Channel 4 pulled in 2.4 million viewers, coming fourth in its 8pm slot. Jamie mate, save us from ourselves and leave this wussy stuff to foodie fan Tom Parker Bowles (he probably needs the work). Come on geezer, if you don't show us the error of our ways, who will? But don't worry - I'll continue to watch your new show, albeit with a heavy sigh.

 

A quick note to fans of new US show Dexter - FX is showing it all over again from the very first episode tomorrow. As someone who has tuned in, I highly recommend it. It's weirdly unnerving viewing though...

 

Today I am mostly lovin' - Sorry to keep saying this, but Heroes is sooooo cool!

 

 

Coronation Street's Liz Dawn has spoken about her "devastating" decision to quit the soap and insisted: "I'll be Vera 'til the day I die." A lifelong smoker, she was diagnosed with lung disease emphysema five years ago. After thirty years of playing Vera Duckworth, her time is up as she's barely able to walk across the set. 
 
"I always thought I would play Vera until my dying day - but now I just want to spend the rest of my days enjoying my life with my family," she told The Sun. She added: "I'll be Vera 'til the day I die and they'll put 'Ta-ra Chuck' on my tombstone." Her final scenes in the ITV1 soap will be screened in January.

 

I'm still coming to terms with this dreadful news which is not only awful for Liz Dawn, her family and friends, but also for Corrie fans and the writers. Iconic soap characters like the Duckworths don't grow on trees and Coronation Street, currently going through a bit of a lull, needs every single one it can get. Such a shame the soap is also losing Cilla and Les Battersby - they would've been ideal replacements. 

 

With very good reason, fans still speak reverently of the likes of: battleaxe Ena Sharples, snobby Annie Walker, brassy Elsie Tanner, saucy Bet Lynch, gossipy Hilda Ogden (and her layabout husband Stan), Scouse binman Eddie Yeats, playboy Mike Baldwin, prissy Mavis Wilton (and her self-righteous hubby Derek), smarmy Reg Holdsworth, Fred "Ah say Fred" Elliott...I could go on. Without a doubt we'll be adding the Duckworths, natural successors to the Ogdens, to that list. Until then, we'll just savour every single second Liz Dawn is onscreen as the legendary Vera Duckworth. 

 

Today I am mostly lovin' - Old tapes. I watched one last night and, to my delight, I'd taped a commercial break which included the classic Levis 501 advert with Nick Kamen. Cool surprise!

 

Today I am mostly hatin' - The worst thing ever about VCRs: a casette got stuck in the machine thanks to copious amounts of tape taking a fancy to the video head drum.

 

MSN Editor Coops

 

The unexpected death of EastEnders' Mike Reid came as a shock. We weren't put on notice; there were no reports of a life-threatening illness and he appeared to be in the best of health. Out of the blue - breaking news. Goodbye to Frank Butcher. It got me thinking about deaths that made an impression on me, for some reason or another.

 

The first star death I recall was Elvis Presley's. I was a little girl, but somehow I knew this was a significant moment. I watched every news bulletin (I'm pretty sure Reginald Bosanquet announced between the News At Ten bongs: "The King of rock n roll is dead" - Elvis fans, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong) and listened to Radio 1's day-long tribute ( Elvis records all day). I vividly remember tears; it just seemed as if the whole world was crying...

 

Another death that affected me was Richard Beckinsale's. The comedy actor, star of The Lovers and Porridge, died in his sleep in 1979 from a massive heart attack. He was only 32. I'd grown used to hearing about old people dying of heart attacks; seeing the pictures of a young Richard Beckinsale accompanying the news of his death was a shock. Such a likeable man too.

 

I was in primary school when John Lennon was murdered in 1980. Parents and teachers were stunned - they couldn't believe a Beatle had been assassinated. At that time, I didn't know the names of the band members, but I'd seen clips of The Beatles; I liked their hair and I knew some of the songs. Why would anyone want to kill a Beatle? I couldn't understand it. Once again, Radio 1 paid full tribute to someone the planet was mourning.

 

In 1984, our family was watching ITV's variety show, Live From Her Majesty's. Comedian Tommy 'just like that' Cooper had us all in stitches. And then he dropped to the ground. Just like the live audience, we laughed even harder. We thought we'd seen a part of his act, but in actuality, he'd collapsed from a massive heart attack. In front of millions of viewers. When the news finally broke, we were astounded.

 

I'll share just one more with you. Unless you were around at the time, it's impossible to convey the impact entertainer Rod Hull made with his Emu puppet in the 1970s and 1980s. In 1999, a freak accident killed him; he fell off his roof adjusting the TV aerial during the Man Utd v Inter Milan game. United won the Treble that season...

 

Today I am mostly lovin' - Paramount Comedy Channel's The Secret Life of Hoodies. Very funny.

 

Today I am mostly hatin' - The Jeremy Kyle Show. Chav TV for the masses.  

 

MSN Editor Coops

 

 

My advice to fans of Doctor Who? Get used to the actor chosen to play the Time Lord quitting after a series or two. Long gone are the days of Jon Pertwee (1970–1974) and the longest serving Doctor (and, most still say, the best) Tom Baker (1974–1981); actors who stayed in the role longer than yer average Hollywood marriage. Now, courtesy of The Sun, we hear that David Tennant will soon hand the keys to the TARDIS over to someone else.

 

Unbelievable as it may seem, not only is the star of the show rumoured to be off, but writer/executive producer Russell T Davies is likely to leave after next year's fourth series too. Who fills their shoes? Well, Steven Moffat is a possibility in terms of taking over from Russell T Davies. Not a bad choice as he's written some very good episodes including: Blink, The Empty Child and The Girl In The Fireplace.

 

But the whisper is that the actor being lined up as the new Doctor Who is...wait for it...James Nesbitt. Yes, James Nesbitt. That's right, the Cold Feet star. Yep, that's him, the geezer from the Yellow Pages ads. Do we likey? I spoke to Whovian Simon Ward, currently working on MSN Money, and he is aghast at the news. "Too gritty and too hard for me" he says. "The Doctor presents a very human side and I just can't see James Nesbitt projecting that." I ask him who he'd like to see instead. The answer may surprise you: "I think it's time for a female Doctor Who. Russell T Davies has taken the show forward and there isn't as much baggage to contend with. There's a new audience who wouldn't blink at the scenario of a woman. In an ideal world, I'd have Maggie Gyllenhaal as the new Doctor. But not James Nesbitt."

 

So, who's your choice to take over from David Tennant? Is it time for a woman? Share your views here.

 

Today I am mostly lovin' - The news that Channel 4 is dropping all its premium rate phone-ins. Let's hope it's the end of those rip-off late night premium rate TV quiz shows. They do not belong on terrestrial TV. ITV and Five - take note. 

 

Today I am mostly hatin' - Big Brother's Big Mouth without Russell Brand. He really made that show 'citin'.

 

MSN Editor Coops

 
Hello all,
 
I'm really looking forward to more sunshine and episodes of Heroes (in that order), but on the first of the month, my blog entry will be about looking back. I've perused all the feedback and mail sent in during July. Here's what you've been saying...
 
First up, Channel 4's Gay Season. To mark the 40th anniversary of 1967's Homosexual Reform Act, Channel 4 screened dramas and documentaries revolving around gay issues. I reviewed some of the programmes here, including Clapham Junction and A Very British Scandal. I received the following email from one user:

 

"I was absolutely disgusted by what I saw in Clapham Junction. I had to turn it off. It was a load of rubbish and it seemed to encourage paedophilia. The whole gay thing was just revolting."

 

And here on my blog, I received this comment:

 

"(no name) - Its wrong and you know it god help you all SICK."  

 

With regard to the first comment, I wasn't entirely happy with the resulting drama either. I outlined my view here. I wouldn't say, "it was a load of rubbish", but it certainly didn't live up to expectations. Yes, the storyline revolving around the 14-year-old boy was one of its most controversial elements and it didn't make for comfortable viewing. I think writer Kevin Elyot set out to be thought-provoking and encourage debate and at the very least, he's accomplished that. As for the statement about "the gay thing" being "revolting" - it's a drama about gay people. Nuff said.

 

I have already answered the second comment, but I will repeat what I said again - live and let live. No way am I gonna slate people for their sexual preferences unless it involves rape, children or animals.

 

A feature I put together on the Best US shows ever provoked debate over at the Telly Talk message board. Twenty of Uncle Sam's finest were showcased including Friends, The Sopranos, Sex And The City, Cheers, Frasier, CSI and Dallas. Some users were quick to point out one particular show they felt I'd wrongly omitted:

 

stubbsy: "Errr... what about Buffy the Vampire Slayer?!?"

Nickolai: "Buffy The Vampire Slayer and Angel should definitely be in there. Buffy had such an influential impact on TV. A lot of shows were spawned as a result."

mytribble: "The above are all correct, not mentioning Buffy the Vampire Slayer is ridiculous. Best television for years and sadly missed. Silly name put a lot of people off but its use of metaphor and symbolism telling stories on many levels set it a cut above most other shows."

 

Guys, that's the problem with doing these lists. There simply isn't room for every show. Looking back at my gallery, I'm also kicking myself for missing out M.A.S.H. and if I had to make room for anything, it would be that series first. However, please continue the debate in this thread and show me the error of my ways - as Dr Frasier Crane often said, I'm listening.

 

That's it for this month as far as the mailbag is concerned; keep your comments, feedback and suggestions coming in.

 

MSN Editor Coops